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This time of year, two romantic holidays sneak up on us—New Year’s Eve, when we all crave that first kiss at midnight, and Valentine’s Day, when we celebrate the power of love, flowers, jewelry, and chocolate. This is also the time of year when we make resolutions—like resolving to rekindle lost love. Well, let me tell you, folks, there’s no better place to light that fire than Maine.
The Virginia Department of Tourism would like you to think that their state is a hot spot “for lovers.” But that’s just nine kinds of wrong. Now, we’re not saying Virginia doesn’t have a lot of nice, charming locations to visit, but let’s face it, Maine’s the most romantic spot in the entire country. Ever held hands with your sweetheart while gazing out at the Atlantic from atop Cadillac Mountain? Ever spent a long winter weekend socked away in a cozy cabin for two? Or hugged your honey while watching the leaves change colors in the fall? In our estimation, Maine’s so close to heaven, its pure, natural beauty can turn the coldest, angriest, meanest son-of-a-gun on the planet into a purring pussycat.
Virginia’s for lovers . . . right.
We asked five well-known couples in the metro area some questions about love, commitment, relationships, and family. (We actually asked more than five, but these brave ones answered!) They agreed to answer the questions separately, so as not to influence their partner’s response. Please enjoy these . . .
How did you and your spouse meet?
Alan: At a Columbus Day dance at the Pirates Den in Guilford, Maine.
Diana: At a high school Columbus Day dance in 1964. I was 16 and Alan was 17.
What initially attracted you to your husband/wife?
Alan: She was beautiful and she asked me to dance on a “ladies’ choice.”
Diana: I don’t really know, but it was something bigger than the usual things. Whatever it was, I followed it with no regrets.
Can you remember when you realized you were in love?
Diana: Almost immediately.
Alan: When I began to think of her more than basketball.
Do you think you argue more or less than most couples? What do you tend to argue about?
Diana: We definitely argue less than most. Almost not at all. When we do it’s over the usual things.
Alan: Money, of course, and my bad habits, but we argue very little.
Does one or both of you being a public figure complicate your married life?
Diana: Alan has a more public life than I. I feel his recognition was a gradual process, so I was able to adjust accordingly. I have always been very proud of Alan’s accomplishments.
Alan: I have more of a public life. Diana is much more private. It was a problem early in our marriage but we are more engaged in it now as a couple.
How did/does having kids change your relationship?
Alan: It changes everything; it forces you outside of yourselves and makes you consider a much larger view of what a life is comprised of.
Diana: It has completed it. We learned how much we agree on the important issues of raising children. They brought more love, routine, and rituals to the marriage that we both embraced.
Do you think you are a good husband/wife? In what ways?
Alan: I think I do pretty well. We share the workload of maintaining a home and family and we both get a great deal of enjoyment from each other.
Diana: Yes, I think so. I think I have remained respectful and considerate to Alan’s thoughts, ideas, and changes over the years.
In what ways is your spouse stronger or smarter than you?
Diana: Alan is like the Webster’s dictionary.
Alan: Her work ethic puts me to shame. She is relentless. She has a great sense about people and character and in that area I often defer to her judgment.
Have you helped “improve” your spouse?
Diana: Absolutely. Without question.
Alan: I would say that I helped to expand her frame of reference in terms of what is possible in life both creatively and spiritually.
Do you have any advice for couples thinking about getting married?
Alan: Falling in love and loving are very different things. If you can hold on for the latter you will never regret it.
Diana: Don’t settle for less then a relationship that can offer you passion and rapture. If the relationship gets serious enough for marriage, then dare to ask yourself if he is fair, loving, compassionate, bright, selfless, motivated, and a damn good friend. If he’s all that and more, then take the plunge.
Rick and Laurie Schweikert
Rick and Laurie Schweikert are co-owners of the Grasshopper Shop. They were married in 1978.
How did you and your spouse meet?
Rick: Walking to kindergarten and first grade (age 5 and 6).
Laurie: Rick likes to think we met in kindergarten, but he didn’t really show any interest until I was a senior in high school.
What initially attracted you to your husband/wife?
Laurie: He was a different, thought-provoking person.
Rick: At 18 she was driving a convertible and looked awesome with her blonde locks flowing.
Can you remember when you realized you were in love?
Laurie: It happened pretty quickly within the first couple months. We just clicked!
Rick: She came to a small party I had invited her to and we simply heldhands, sitting on the floor for hours, and talked.
How has love changed for you over time?
Laurie: It’s deeper, fuller. More tolerant and we don’t sweat the little stuff.
Rick: Deeper and more complete. Less emotional and less reactive.
Are you equal partners or is one of you “the dominant one”?
Laurie: We are equally dominant in different areas.
Rick: Equal. Except for my outbursts.
Do you think you argue more or less than most couples? What do you tend to argue about?
Laurie: It can be a challenge to commute and work together every day. We don’t argue much, but we occasionally have “heated debates.” Mostly over work issues.
Rick: We argue less. When we do, it’s usually about finances.
How did/does having kids change your relationship?
Laurie: It enriches and at times dominates your life. It is a joy to have their friends and partners become a part of our family circle.
Rick: Completes it, fulfills it, gives it more purpose.
When you say “I love you” to your spouse, what does that mean to you?
Laurie: Unconditional love.
Rick: You mean everything to me.
What are some of the most important moments in your life you’ve shared?
Laurie: The birth and nurturing of our children. Spending quality time with family and friends.
Rick: Birth of three daughters. Marriage of 29 years. Beautiful trips together with our family.
In what ways is your spouse stronger or smarter than you?
Laurie: Rick is great at figuring out spatial stuff. Also, he has a good mind for numbers.
Rick: Her communication skills are stronger.
The quote “A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle” is attributed to feminist Gloria Steinem. Complete the quote to suit yourself.
Laurie: A woman without a man is whatever she chooses to be.
Rick: A man without a woman is simply a lonely guy.
How did you and your spouse meet?
Cori: We met at a charity turkey drive being held by the radio station I worked for at the time. It was a cold November night in the Brewer Hannaford parking lot in 2001.
Mike: We met at the 2001 Free the Z turkey drive.
What initially attracted you to your husband/wife?
Mike: Her eyes and personality.
Cori: I thought he was handsome . . . then as I got to know him, I liked his confidence. He’s also very tall, as am I for a girl, and he was the first guy to make me feel little and dainty.
How has love changed for you over time?
Cori: It’s changed from the initial giddiness and intensity of early love, to a much deeper appreciation, admiration, and respect for my partner.
Mike: I can honestly say that when you enter into a marriage with someone, you stop loving that person and start learning to love them. To me, when you make a commitment like that, you are obligated to work through every possible solution when a problem arises. Love caused us to set up rules for fighting, money management, and other situations.
Are you equal partners or is one of you “the dominant one”?
Cori: We are equal, although he does a good job of letting me think I am the dominant one. While in reality, I may be the louder of the two, I respect his voice and feelings as much as he does mine. As they said in My Big Fat Greek Wedding, “he may be the head of the household, but I am the neck!” We each play a part in making the decisions.
Mike: We are equal partners. I often joke that I wear the pants, but she picks out the color.
Does one or both of you being a public figure complicate your married life?
Mike: I would say that since she works in the public spotlight, there are times when other men have tried to “hit on” my wife, which really makes me mad, especially when they know she is married to me (and even more so when I am standing right there!). I never question my wife’s fidelity due to the extreme trust we have for each other but that doesn’t change my dislike of it. My wife usually shuts it down though.
Cori: I don’t envy him. Being married to me has not been easy. When you have been a public figure for as long as I have, especially one that has grown up in this area, some people believe that they are a part of your life, even if you have never met them. My husband has been exceedingly patient and gracious with people that come up to me at times when we’re out and want to chat. He’s also been patient when people have tried to hit on me when he is standing right next to me. If the tables were turned, I would already have slapped a number of people across the face!
How did/does having kids change your relationship?
Cori: When I found out we were pregnant, I was so thrilled. The one question that I had asked myself when Michael proposed was “Can I see myself raising children with this man?” Without hesitation, my gut, heart, and head all said yes. And from that day on, I have been looking forward to seeing him be a dad to our kids. Even though our son is still weeks away from being born, I feel our son’s conception has strengthened even further our respect and love, our sense of partnership and our excitement at being in this together!
Mike: When I found out my wife was pregnant, my whole perspective of our relationship changed. I fell in love with her all over again.
In what ways is your spouse stronger or smarter than you?
Cori: He’s a whiz with computers and technology I am unfamiliar with. He does his research before making big purchases. And he is patient . . . I’m not so patient!
Mike: She never sugarcoats anything like I do. She is in many ways stronger willed than I am; in other words, she likes to win a debate.
The quote “A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle” is attributed to feminist Gloria Steinem. Complete the quote to suit yourself.
Mike: A man without a woman is like a heart without a pulse.
Cori: A woman without a man is bored.
How did you and your spouse meet?
Rob: Through mutual friends.
Joanne: Through mutual friends at the Lawrence, Mass. Y. At the time we were both engaged to other people and our friends knew we should be together. They both invited us to a party separately, but I sensed they were setting up a blind date, so I went alone. He called me a week later.
What initially attracted you to your husband/wife?
Joanne: To be completely honest, I was looking at other guys at the party, but there was something interesting and different about him. He is a great person. He is very humorous and easy to talk to and almost always has a positive outlook. We enjoy a lot of the same things like downhill skiing, dancing, music, getting together with friends, playing cribbage, water sports, golf, tennis, going to concerts, and he is very attractive.
Rob: Her smile, she was a caring person, her long hair, her figure.
Can you remember when you realized you were in love?
Joanne: We were at a ski house with friends in Vermont and it was Valentine’s Day and I presented him with a card with my feelings, and the one he gave me wasn’t as sentimental. I think he felt the same way but he didn’t want to express it to me then. I just had to wait and see if he felt the same way, and it wasn’t long after that.
Rob: When I realized I was happier being with her and the more time we spent together the happier I was.
Are you equal partners or is one of you “the dominant one”?
Joanne: Equal. We always kid each other that no one would put up with either one of us. That we were meant to be together. Although, he manages the finances and is the better planner for the future. I like to live each day one day at a time.
Rob: I am the dominant one.
How did/does having kids change your relationship?
Joanne: Rob wanted children right away and I kept saying, “next year, like the Red Sox.” Good thing we didn’t wait. Our girls have totally enriched our lives and made our love grow deeper and stronger. They bring so much joy to our lives as well as their friends and families. We love to entertain at our house.
Rob: The bond of parenthood makes us closer, connected for life.
When you think about your husband/wife, what makes you smile?
Rob: How wonderful a woman and mother she is.
Joanne: Silly things and the wonderful things he does as a husband and father. Also, his dedication to everything in life.
What makes you frustrated?
Rob: When she can’t find things.
Joanne: He sometimes doesn’t know when to stop or say no.
In what ways is your spouse stronger or smarter than you?
Joanne: I wish I could keep up with him and I would like some of his energy. He puts things in perspective for me when I am down.
Rob: She cooks better, sews, and is more creative.
Have you helped “improve” your spouse?
Joanne: I hope so. I’ve helped him to be more patient, to unwind when stressed, and I have always been there to listen.
Rob: I have helped to improve her, help her plan ahead, I have given her good connections due to my job.
Does your spouse “complete” you, make you a whole and better person?
Rob: Yes, she completes me. My weaknesses are her strengths.
Joanne: Yes, he is always there for me. He is the love of my life.
Ric Tyler is a radio personality on WVOM-FM; Elizabeth Sutherland owns a marketing communications agency. They were married in 1996.
How did you and your spouse meet?
Ric: We met during the planning of a charity event to benefit the Pine Tree Chapter of the American Red Cross. Elizabeth was the coordinator, I was the radio guy at the live broadcast, and we were both subjects in a matchmaking scheme by mutual friends.
Elizabeth: I was working for the American Red Cross, Ric was working for Kiss 94.5. Ric was the on-air talent assigned to help us promote a fundraising event. Sparks flew right away. I could tell he was going to be special.
What initially attracted you?
Elizabeth: Let’s see . . . He desperately needed a haircut; he was wearing wrinkled parachute cargo pants and a black satin Kiss 94.5 jacket right out of a bad remake of the movie Grease. So I guess I’d have to say his charm and wit.
Ric: First of all, she is beautiful. Second, when we spoke live on the radio it was like we were reading off a script. We weren’t. We were sharing thoughts and comments seamlessly. After, we both smiled.
When did you realize you were in love?
Elizabeth: We’d known each other for just a few weeks. We were sitting on the jungle gym beside the Abraham Lincoln School having a conversation that seamlessly moved between deep, meaningful subjects and inconsequential things. That’s when I knew.
Ric: It was a spiritual thing. Lock me up and call me crazy, but I knew Elizabeth was the woman with whom I would fall in love and marry after speaking with her on the telephone for 20 minutes on April 19, 1995. That was the first in a nothing-short-of-remarkable series of events that erased any doubt.
How has love changed for you over time?
Ric: I thought I had an idea of what love is. After I met Elizabeth, I found I didn’t really know what love is. Before we were blessed with our son, I thought I knew what love is. Ian has redefined love for both of us. Love continually changes us—for the better.
Elizabeth: I am willing to answer these personal questions. I never would have done this prior to meeting Ric.
Are you equal partners or is one of you “the dominant one”?
Ric: We are equal partners. ‘Cept she never rubs MY feet!
Elizabeth: We are equal partners. That doesn’t mean we do things equally. But we share responsibility equally. In other words, don’t let Ric offer to cook you a meal, ever. But he’s great at taking out the garbage.
Do you think you argue more or less than most couples? What do you tend to argue about?
Ric: We’ve only argued three times. Once about money. Once about religion. And the ongoing one about politics.
Elizabeth: We have been known to have some rather heated conversations—especially about politics. But I can count the number of true arguments we’ve had on one hand.
Does one or both of you being a public figure complicate your married life?
Ric: Elizabeth occasionally lets me know when I’ve broadcast a bit too much about our life. I try to share only the approved material, or share the unauthorized material when I know that she isn’t listening. That said, I’d appreciate a little more help from the listening audience; when I say, “Don’t tell Elizabeth,” I mean it!
Elizabeth: It’s a good thing that I have thick skin, because there are many times he tells wickedly exaggerated stories about me on the radio!
How did/does having kids change your relationship?
Elizabeth: Ric is a great dad. Seeing him in that role gives me another reason to love him.
Ric: Sure there’s more responsibility and a greater cost, but with Ian in our lives, Elizabeth and I have more to laugh about, more to love about, and more to live for.
Have you helped “improve” your spouse?
Ric: Yes, I’ve tried. Oh, how I’ve tried. But she still votes Democrat.
Elizabeth: Please. He used to wear parachute cargo pants. I deserve medals.
Do you think you are a good husband/wife? In what ways?
Elizabeth: Ric is a better husband than I am a wife. He’s a generous, giving person. Especially of his time and energy. But I do work really hard at ensuring that he doesn’t wear wrinkled cargo pants to work anymore!
Ric: Honestly, one of my prayers is that God make me into the husband I must be to deserve someone as wonderful in my life as Elizabeth. That challenges me to do more, be more, and try harder. I might even throw in a load of laundry.
* * *
The Virginia Department of Tourism would like you to think that their state is a hot spot “for lovers.” But that’s just nine kinds of wrong. Now, we’re not saying Virginia doesn’t have a lot of nice, charming locations to visit, but let’s face it, Maine’s the most romantic spot in the entire country. Ever held hands with your sweetheart while gazing out at the Atlantic from atop Cadillac Mountain? Ever spent a long winter weekend socked away in a cozy cabin for two? Or hugged your honey while watching the leaves change colors in the fall? In our estimation, Maine’s so close to heaven, its pure, natural beauty can turn the coldest, angriest, meanest son-of-a-gun on the planet into a purring pussycat.
Virginia’s for lovers . . . right.
Advertisement
We asked five well-known couples in the metro area some questions about love, commitment, relationships, and family. (We actually asked more than five, but these brave ones answered!) They agreed to answer the questions separately, so as not to influence their partner’s response. Please enjoy these . . .
Testimonial from Mainers in Love
Alan & Diana Bray
Alan Bray is an artist; Diana Bray is a nurse. They were married in 1967.How did you and your spouse meet?
Alan: At a Columbus Day dance at the Pirates Den in Guilford, Maine.
Diana: At a high school Columbus Day dance in 1964. I was 16 and Alan was 17.
What initially attracted you to your husband/wife?
Alan: She was beautiful and she asked me to dance on a “ladies’ choice.”
Diana: I don’t really know, but it was something bigger than the usual things. Whatever it was, I followed it with no regrets.
Can you remember when you realized you were in love?
Diana: Almost immediately.
Alan: When I began to think of her more than basketball.
Do you think you argue more or less than most couples? What do you tend to argue about?
Diana: We definitely argue less than most. Almost not at all. When we do it’s over the usual things.
Alan: Money, of course, and my bad habits, but we argue very little.
Does one or both of you being a public figure complicate your married life?
Diana: Alan has a more public life than I. I feel his recognition was a gradual process, so I was able to adjust accordingly. I have always been very proud of Alan’s accomplishments.
Alan: I have more of a public life. Diana is much more private. It was a problem early in our marriage but we are more engaged in it now as a couple.
How did/does having kids change your relationship?
Alan: It changes everything; it forces you outside of yourselves and makes you consider a much larger view of what a life is comprised of.
Diana: It has completed it. We learned how much we agree on the important issues of raising children. They brought more love, routine, and rituals to the marriage that we both embraced.
Do you think you are a good husband/wife? In what ways?
Alan: I think I do pretty well. We share the workload of maintaining a home and family and we both get a great deal of enjoyment from each other.
Diana: Yes, I think so. I think I have remained respectful and considerate to Alan’s thoughts, ideas, and changes over the years.
In what ways is your spouse stronger or smarter than you?
Diana: Alan is like the Webster’s dictionary.
Alan: Her work ethic puts me to shame. She is relentless. She has a great sense about people and character and in that area I often defer to her judgment.
Have you helped “improve” your spouse?
Diana: Absolutely. Without question.
Alan: I would say that I helped to expand her frame of reference in terms of what is possible in life both creatively and spiritually.
Do you have any advice for couples thinking about getting married?
Alan: Falling in love and loving are very different things. If you can hold on for the latter you will never regret it.
Diana: Don’t settle for less then a relationship that can offer you passion and rapture. If the relationship gets serious enough for marriage, then dare to ask yourself if he is fair, loving, compassionate, bright, selfless, motivated, and a damn good friend. If he’s all that and more, then take the plunge.
Rick and Laurie Schweikert
Rick and Laurie Schweikert are co-owners of the Grasshopper Shop. They were married in 1978.How did you and your spouse meet?
Rick: Walking to kindergarten and first grade (age 5 and 6).
Laurie: Rick likes to think we met in kindergarten, but he didn’t really show any interest until I was a senior in high school.
What initially attracted you to your husband/wife?
Laurie: He was a different, thought-provoking person.
Rick: At 18 she was driving a convertible and looked awesome with her blonde locks flowing.
Can you remember when you realized you were in love?
Laurie: It happened pretty quickly within the first couple months. We just clicked!
Rick: She came to a small party I had invited her to and we simply heldhands, sitting on the floor for hours, and talked.
How has love changed for you over time?
Laurie: It’s deeper, fuller. More tolerant and we don’t sweat the little stuff.
Rick: Deeper and more complete. Less emotional and less reactive.
Are you equal partners or is one of you “the dominant one”?
Laurie: We are equally dominant in different areas.
Rick: Equal. Except for my outbursts.
Do you think you argue more or less than most couples? What do you tend to argue about?
Laurie: It can be a challenge to commute and work together every day. We don’t argue much, but we occasionally have “heated debates.” Mostly over work issues.
Rick: We argue less. When we do, it’s usually about finances.
How did/does having kids change your relationship?
Laurie: It enriches and at times dominates your life. It is a joy to have their friends and partners become a part of our family circle.
Rick: Completes it, fulfills it, gives it more purpose.
When you say “I love you” to your spouse, what does that mean to you?
Laurie: Unconditional love.
Rick: You mean everything to me.
What are some of the most important moments in your life you’ve shared?
Laurie: The birth and nurturing of our children. Spending quality time with family and friends.
Rick: Birth of three daughters. Marriage of 29 years. Beautiful trips together with our family.
In what ways is your spouse stronger or smarter than you?
Laurie: Rick is great at figuring out spatial stuff. Also, he has a good mind for numbers.
Rick: Her communication skills are stronger.
The quote “A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle” is attributed to feminist Gloria Steinem. Complete the quote to suit yourself.
Laurie: A woman without a man is whatever she chooses to be.
Rick: A man without a woman is simply a lonely guy.
Cori & Mike Skall
Cori Skall is a reporter for WABI-TV5; Mike Skall is a computer department supervisor at Best Buy. They were married in 2004.How did you and your spouse meet?
Cori: We met at a charity turkey drive being held by the radio station I worked for at the time. It was a cold November night in the Brewer Hannaford parking lot in 2001.
Mike: We met at the 2001 Free the Z turkey drive.
What initially attracted you to your husband/wife?
Mike: Her eyes and personality.
Cori: I thought he was handsome . . . then as I got to know him, I liked his confidence. He’s also very tall, as am I for a girl, and he was the first guy to make me feel little and dainty.
How has love changed for you over time?
Cori: It’s changed from the initial giddiness and intensity of early love, to a much deeper appreciation, admiration, and respect for my partner.
Mike: I can honestly say that when you enter into a marriage with someone, you stop loving that person and start learning to love them. To me, when you make a commitment like that, you are obligated to work through every possible solution when a problem arises. Love caused us to set up rules for fighting, money management, and other situations.
Are you equal partners or is one of you “the dominant one”?
Cori: We are equal, although he does a good job of letting me think I am the dominant one. While in reality, I may be the louder of the two, I respect his voice and feelings as much as he does mine. As they said in My Big Fat Greek Wedding, “he may be the head of the household, but I am the neck!” We each play a part in making the decisions.
Mike: We are equal partners. I often joke that I wear the pants, but she picks out the color.
Does one or both of you being a public figure complicate your married life?
Mike: I would say that since she works in the public spotlight, there are times when other men have tried to “hit on” my wife, which really makes me mad, especially when they know she is married to me (and even more so when I am standing right there!). I never question my wife’s fidelity due to the extreme trust we have for each other but that doesn’t change my dislike of it. My wife usually shuts it down though.
Cori: I don’t envy him. Being married to me has not been easy. When you have been a public figure for as long as I have, especially one that has grown up in this area, some people believe that they are a part of your life, even if you have never met them. My husband has been exceedingly patient and gracious with people that come up to me at times when we’re out and want to chat. He’s also been patient when people have tried to hit on me when he is standing right next to me. If the tables were turned, I would already have slapped a number of people across the face!
How did/does having kids change your relationship?
Cori: When I found out we were pregnant, I was so thrilled. The one question that I had asked myself when Michael proposed was “Can I see myself raising children with this man?” Without hesitation, my gut, heart, and head all said yes. And from that day on, I have been looking forward to seeing him be a dad to our kids. Even though our son is still weeks away from being born, I feel our son’s conception has strengthened even further our respect and love, our sense of partnership and our excitement at being in this together!
Mike: When I found out my wife was pregnant, my whole perspective of our relationship changed. I fell in love with her all over again.
In what ways is your spouse stronger or smarter than you?
Cori: He’s a whiz with computers and technology I am unfamiliar with. He does his research before making big purchases. And he is patient . . . I’m not so patient!
Mike: She never sugarcoats anything like I do. She is in many ways stronger willed than I am; in other words, she likes to win a debate.
The quote “A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle” is attributed to feminist Gloria Steinem. Complete the quote to suit yourself.
Mike: A man without a woman is like a heart without a pulse.
Cori: A woman without a man is bored.
Rob & Joanne Reeves
Rob Reeves is director of the Bangor Y; Joanne Reeves is an office manager. They were married in 1984.How did you and your spouse meet?
Rob: Through mutual friends.
Joanne: Through mutual friends at the Lawrence, Mass. Y. At the time we were both engaged to other people and our friends knew we should be together. They both invited us to a party separately, but I sensed they were setting up a blind date, so I went alone. He called me a week later.
What initially attracted you to your husband/wife?
Joanne: To be completely honest, I was looking at other guys at the party, but there was something interesting and different about him. He is a great person. He is very humorous and easy to talk to and almost always has a positive outlook. We enjoy a lot of the same things like downhill skiing, dancing, music, getting together with friends, playing cribbage, water sports, golf, tennis, going to concerts, and he is very attractive.
Rob: Her smile, she was a caring person, her long hair, her figure.
Can you remember when you realized you were in love?
Joanne: We were at a ski house with friends in Vermont and it was Valentine’s Day and I presented him with a card with my feelings, and the one he gave me wasn’t as sentimental. I think he felt the same way but he didn’t want to express it to me then. I just had to wait and see if he felt the same way, and it wasn’t long after that.
Rob: When I realized I was happier being with her and the more time we spent together the happier I was.
Are you equal partners or is one of you “the dominant one”?
Joanne: Equal. We always kid each other that no one would put up with either one of us. That we were meant to be together. Although, he manages the finances and is the better planner for the future. I like to live each day one day at a time.
Rob: I am the dominant one.
How did/does having kids change your relationship?
Joanne: Rob wanted children right away and I kept saying, “next year, like the Red Sox.” Good thing we didn’t wait. Our girls have totally enriched our lives and made our love grow deeper and stronger. They bring so much joy to our lives as well as their friends and families. We love to entertain at our house.
Rob: The bond of parenthood makes us closer, connected for life.
When you think about your husband/wife, what makes you smile?
Rob: How wonderful a woman and mother she is.
Joanne: Silly things and the wonderful things he does as a husband and father. Also, his dedication to everything in life.
What makes you frustrated?
Rob: When she can’t find things.
Joanne: He sometimes doesn’t know when to stop or say no.
In what ways is your spouse stronger or smarter than you?
Joanne: I wish I could keep up with him and I would like some of his energy. He puts things in perspective for me when I am down.
Rob: She cooks better, sews, and is more creative.
Have you helped “improve” your spouse?
Joanne: I hope so. I’ve helped him to be more patient, to unwind when stressed, and I have always been there to listen.
Rob: I have helped to improve her, help her plan ahead, I have given her good connections due to my job.
Does your spouse “complete” you, make you a whole and better person?
Rob: Yes, she completes me. My weaknesses are her strengths.
Joanne: Yes, he is always there for me. He is the love of my life.
Ric Tyler & Elizabeth Sutherland
Ric Tyler is a radio personality on WVOM-FM; Elizabeth Sutherland owns a marketing communications agency. They were married in 1996.How did you and your spouse meet?
Ric: We met during the planning of a charity event to benefit the Pine Tree Chapter of the American Red Cross. Elizabeth was the coordinator, I was the radio guy at the live broadcast, and we were both subjects in a matchmaking scheme by mutual friends.
Elizabeth: I was working for the American Red Cross, Ric was working for Kiss 94.5. Ric was the on-air talent assigned to help us promote a fundraising event. Sparks flew right away. I could tell he was going to be special.
What initially attracted you?
Elizabeth: Let’s see . . . He desperately needed a haircut; he was wearing wrinkled parachute cargo pants and a black satin Kiss 94.5 jacket right out of a bad remake of the movie Grease. So I guess I’d have to say his charm and wit.
Ric: First of all, she is beautiful. Second, when we spoke live on the radio it was like we were reading off a script. We weren’t. We were sharing thoughts and comments seamlessly. After, we both smiled.
When did you realize you were in love?
Elizabeth: We’d known each other for just a few weeks. We were sitting on the jungle gym beside the Abraham Lincoln School having a conversation that seamlessly moved between deep, meaningful subjects and inconsequential things. That’s when I knew.
Ric: It was a spiritual thing. Lock me up and call me crazy, but I knew Elizabeth was the woman with whom I would fall in love and marry after speaking with her on the telephone for 20 minutes on April 19, 1995. That was the first in a nothing-short-of-remarkable series of events that erased any doubt.
How has love changed for you over time?
Ric: I thought I had an idea of what love is. After I met Elizabeth, I found I didn’t really know what love is. Before we were blessed with our son, I thought I knew what love is. Ian has redefined love for both of us. Love continually changes us—for the better.
Elizabeth: I am willing to answer these personal questions. I never would have done this prior to meeting Ric.
Are you equal partners or is one of you “the dominant one”?
Ric: We are equal partners. ‘Cept she never rubs MY feet!
Elizabeth: We are equal partners. That doesn’t mean we do things equally. But we share responsibility equally. In other words, don’t let Ric offer to cook you a meal, ever. But he’s great at taking out the garbage.
Do you think you argue more or less than most couples? What do you tend to argue about?
Ric: We’ve only argued three times. Once about money. Once about religion. And the ongoing one about politics.
Elizabeth: We have been known to have some rather heated conversations—especially about politics. But I can count the number of true arguments we’ve had on one hand.
Does one or both of you being a public figure complicate your married life?
Ric: Elizabeth occasionally lets me know when I’ve broadcast a bit too much about our life. I try to share only the approved material, or share the unauthorized material when I know that she isn’t listening. That said, I’d appreciate a little more help from the listening audience; when I say, “Don’t tell Elizabeth,” I mean it!
Elizabeth: It’s a good thing that I have thick skin, because there are many times he tells wickedly exaggerated stories about me on the radio!
How did/does having kids change your relationship?
Elizabeth: Ric is a great dad. Seeing him in that role gives me another reason to love him.
Ric: Sure there’s more responsibility and a greater cost, but with Ian in our lives, Elizabeth and I have more to laugh about, more to love about, and more to live for.
Have you helped “improve” your spouse?
Ric: Yes, I’ve tried. Oh, how I’ve tried. But she still votes Democrat.
Elizabeth: Please. He used to wear parachute cargo pants. I deserve medals.
Do you think you are a good husband/wife? In what ways?
Elizabeth: Ric is a better husband than I am a wife. He’s a generous, giving person. Especially of his time and energy. But I do work really hard at ensuring that he doesn’t wear wrinkled cargo pants to work anymore!
Ric: Honestly, one of my prayers is that God make me into the husband I must be to deserve someone as wonderful in my life as Elizabeth. That challenges me to do more, be more, and try harder. I might even throw in a load of laundry.
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